Received a text this past weekend from “My Favorite” (aka: our youngest – the one that put her own info in my phone and labeled herself “My Favorite” and then added emojis of a pile of poop…and a Koala Bear?!?) So…yeah…
The text read:
“Happy 2 year anniversary of the day that I found out I didn’t get into A&M….
Remember when we wept uncontrollably in the soda aisle of Walmart?”
Wow…2 years ago and the feelings still come back strong. It’s never fun to watch your own dreams “die”, let alone the dreams of your child – the one that she has dreamt of for…oh…like a decade.
So many lessons we both/all learned during this time. I remember when she applied to the “school of her dreams” and then waited…and waited…and waited to get a response. After months of waiting, and her checking her profile (for an update) HOURLY, she came to me one afternoon with her laptop and asked me to “Change the password so that I can’t check this anymore….honestly, it’s becoming too important and too much of an obsession”. While I was proud of her for realizing the control this information was having over her emotions, this also meant that I would probably see/find out the news before she did…this was either AWESOME or a difficult situation to be in.
However, the news came in the form of a letter – offering her options to attend but…not the “in” that she was dreaming of (and, quite frankly, we were expecting). She had done all the “right things” (good grades, applied early, had letters of recommendation from alumni and key leaders, essays were great, etc.) so the news hit hard.
So – “YES”…in answer to her text…I remember that day, in the aisle of Walmart. Surrounded by soda – we WEPT (and no, it wasn’t the first time we wept after she tore in to the letter…HELLO – it took us a while to even leave the house that day and the only reason we were at the store was for “comfort food”!).
We all wrestled with the “What are you doing, God?” but none more than Brooke herself. She was hurt/upset but honestly – she was MAD. I felt her anger, even when we jumped on board the new plan – her “backup school” – OSU. She put on a brave face on move-in day, but I knew she still wasn’t “all in”. It was tough to drive away after that weekend…praying that we would all trust that God DID “know best”.
But Ohhhh…what a difference two years makes!! 🙂 I remember the day, right around Christmas of her first year, that she sent me a text that said,
“Hey – remember when I wanted to be wearing maroon??
What was I thinking with that??
I LOVE ORANGE!”
God has provided her with amazing friends, strong connections with classmates/co-workers, a great church, an adorable house with 3 fun roommates, amazing teachers, and a job that is providing her valuable training that she will take with her. Most of all – God has proven himself faithful…to our daughter and to us.
This past weekend she posted these words (on social media)…
“Two years ago today, my world was flipped upside down as my “dream college” turned into a letter of rejection. It quickly became more than that though as I got angry with God (who I believed had made a mistake). It sounds silly now, but I doubted, questioned, and attempted to test the power of God and why He would let something that I wanted be denied. But, I wanted it. Not Him. The past 2 years have been full of discovering how sweet and good the Lord’s perfect plan is when compared to my “dreams”. Not just on where I ended up going to college, but in every aspect of my life. It’s days like this where I think back and am SO thankful that I got that little piece of paper in the mail. The Lord has taught me so much about faith and trust through a situation that was, at one time, my nightmare. Thankful to be able to take Pistol Pete selfies, have a wardrobe based on the color orange and continue to pursue Christ in Stillwater! Go Pokes!”
It was a #proudmommoment but, more importantly, a reminder that my daughter amazes me with her willingness to share how she is being molded and shaped by her Creator! I’m thankful for OSU and the great fit it is for her, but this isn’t about certain schools/mascots/states. It’s really about a young woman seeing God work in her life and embracing HIS plan for her uniquely. It’s about my daughter – with whom I am well pleased and hope to be more like one day.
I love you, “My Favorite”…thankful to have a front row seat to what God is doing in your life!
#Godisgoodallthetime & #allthetimeGodisgood
#GoPokes #classof2017 (praying THAT is God’s plan as well!) 🙂
I love this, Lori. Thank you for sharing, because surrendering my dreams to God has been an on-going lesson through the entirety of my walk with God (going on two decades soon), and I won’t even START with how hard surrendering my dreams for my children has been (like, DAILY). These reminders of His goodness and faithfulness are so encouraging and uplifting!
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